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Breast Cancer and the Single Woman

August 27, 2006
by Lianne Avila, MA, MFT

After being diagnosed with Breast Cancer, many women may feel alone.  The love and support of family members and friends can be comforting at this time, but nothing can change the fact that you have Breast Cancer.  The sense of isolation may be especially overwhelming for single women.  Feeling helpless is a perfectly normal reaction when facing a life-threatening illness.  Women must identify resources and support, so they can move forward with their lives.
 
Find a friend.  Make sure you find a partner that cares enough about you to be a friend first.  This is someone you can be honest with and not have to feel ashamed about having Breast Cancer.
 
Be honest.  When in doubt honesty is the best policy.  When you are ready, it is important you are honest with your partner.  Let your partner know exactly what has happened and what you have had done to you.  Let your partner know how you are doing now and how you feel.  Breast Cancer is not a rare disorder.  Most people know somebody close to them that has been affected by Breast Cancer. 
 
Dump a person that canít cope.  Unfortunately, there are people that canít think beyond Breast Cancer.  If this is the case, then dump them!  You deserve better!!!
 
Finding a good companion is always a challenge, but there is hope.  There are some good ones out there.  Youíve got to take a risk and move forward with your life.
 
Looking for a partner?
Try these suggestions:
 
Check out the new-style bookstores, with space for refreshments and socializing.
 
Find out what activities your community center, church or synagogue provides for single members to get together.
 
Take out a personal ad or answer one.
 
As a Breast Cancer survivor diagnosed at age 30 and single.  I understand the range of emotions you can go through when you are single.  If these tips are not enough, then I encourage you to attend a support group for single women or seek the help of a Licensed Counselor.  For more information, I invite you to check out www.TouchedWithCancer.com.
 
Happy Dating!
Lianne Avila, MA
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
 


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